Here’s a hint: Each character is a university student—just like us!
- The next time you and your new friends chill out by the Roddick Gates, make sure to act like this character and start accusing them of trying to murder you. It’s not her fault—she’s just trying to look out for her loved ones after eight murders in their hometown. Her favourite subway station is the Burnside tunnel, but she’s worried a copycat killer is just around the corner—and there could be more than one. But don’t worry, McGill students! Her college campus looks exactly like yours, but this is Montréal, not New York.
- This guy is a legacy at his university, but his best friend is still learning the ropes as a newcomer who can’t get into his program of choice. When his best friend bets his entire education on his misfit fraternity winning intramurals, this character reluctantly offers to help, knowing they might have to drop out if this plan goes badly.
- Imagine you didn’t get into McGill, or even Harvard—your safety school. What now? For this character, the answer is to create their own university and fool their parents in the process. It’s easy! All you need is a children’s shoe salesman to teach your ethics class, a friend who can blow up your enemy’s car with his mind, a comp sci student to make your dupe website, and some cash to bribe your little sister to keep her mouth shut. This is legal… right?
- ACAB, but this cop should quit and become a slam poet. Now that’s talent.
- This character is a tech-savvy, rebellious media studies major at an Ivy League university where most students are white—she, as well as the film’s three other main characters, are Black. Armed with her intelligence and a campus radio show to snarkily respond to their classmates’ racism, her activism leads to an explosive Halloween party. I guess it’s hard for some people to hear the truth.
- While people now may call this character a lizard man in real life, know that he was once a respectable Harvard student on academic probation. It wasn’t his fault—he was only trying to get revenge on his girlfriend. Of course, that turned into making a creepy rating website for girls in his class, which turned into making a flop dating website for Ivy League schools, which turned into making the biggest social platform of our generation. But who needs friends IRL when you can make friends online?
- Whether it’s battling the know-it-alls in class, facing the condescending boyfriend who thinks he’s going to be president, or befriending the he’s-definitely-not-my-type-but-why-am-I-attracted TA, there’s a bit of all us in this student. From California to Massachusetts, they’re all about dedication, loyalty, and the power of believing in yourself, with more than a little sparkle thrown in. Riddle us this: What do you get when you mix impeccable hair-perming knowledge, a trusty sidekick, an unrelenting pursuit of the family rock, and a gleaming French mani? The correct answer: One kick-ass lawyer.
- Imagine this: Elie Saab gowns, high tea at the Ritz, and a boyfriend who doesn’t believe in feelings (other than feeling like “you betrayed him” when all you were trying to do was protect what he cares about most—but now he’s saying you were what he cared about most—but it didn’t look like that way when Jack was here and now… anyway). Who needs class when you have a city to run, princes to fend off, and schemes to be schemed? All with the help of an elusive local blog that can’t get enough of you and your friends.
Answers: 1. Mindy Meeks-Martin, Scream VI 2. Sully, Monsters University 3. Bartleby Gains, Accepted 4. Schmidt, 22 Jump Street 5. Samantha White, Dear White People 6. Mark Zuckerberg, The Social Network 7. Elle Woods, Legally Blonde 8. Blair Waldorf, Gossip Girl
