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a, Arts & Entertainment

Don’t put this conscious comic in a corner

sophiek.com

If comedians were meals, Hari Kondabolu would be the delicious, home-cooked variety. Other stand-up comics are frequently almost equally tasty, but often, I find myself enjoying a routine only to feel nauseous looking back at what I’ve tacitly endorsed with my laughter—exactly how I feel after eating McDonald’s. Following a Kondabolu set, I feel good.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to make the guy sound boring—he is laugh-until-you-hurt funny. What’s special is that Kondabolu’s brand of socially conscious stand-up manages to be utterly hilarious while also utterly avoiding the racist, sexist, and homophobic jokes that have made such easy fodder for others. Sitting in the audience, I laughed hard at everything, without glancing around guiltily to see if other members of the audience were the butt of the joke.

Kondabolu got into comedy at an early age, starting to write at age 16,  influenced by the likes of Margaret Cho, Stewart Lee, and Paul Mooney. At Bowdoin College he started to move away from some of the easy, sometimes stereotypical jokes of his youth and towards political humour, and particularly, the politics of race.

In 2006 Kondabolu made a short movie, Manoj, where he portrays both an Indian comic named Manoj who uses stereotypical portrayals of Indians for easy laughs—”A lot of times people come up to me and say, ‘Manoj, why do Indian people eat monkey brains all the time?'” Manoj says in the film. “That is simply not true. If you knew anything about monkey brains you’d know monkey brains are very, very expensive. You can’t just eat them all the time. If I had a dime for every time someone came up to me and asked, I could actually afford to eat monkey brains!”—and himself, an Indian comic disgusted by Manoj’s material. The film was a hit, airing at the Just For Laughs Comedy Festival .

Kondabolu didn’t take a normal road to comedy, if there is such a thing. After graduating from Bowdoin College he moved to Seattle to work as an immigrant rights organizer, focusing on “detention and deportation issues,” while continuing to do stand-up at night. There, he found a supportive community of comedians and other artists and was able to make new strides with his material. Eventually, he applied to a human rights masters program at the London School of Economics.  

Everything happened at once for Kondabolu: he was discovered by the HBO comedy festival, he got a set on Jimmy Kimmel Live, and he got into LSE, all in the same week.

“I didn’t know what the fuck to do because comedy wasn’t the plan. I just really liked doing it and you’ve seen what I do, I just didn’t assume this would work in more than Seattle, San Francisco, now Montreal, … there’s [only] a handful of places I could play, so it was kind of weird I was getting mainstream national recognition,” Kondabolu said.

He decided to take a year off from comedy to get his masters, but came right back afterwards. For the past three years he’s travelled and performed, played a part in a Sandra Bullock movie, and built his reputation.

“I don’t want to be niche to be perfectly honest. I don’t think the issues I’m talking about are niche. Racism should not be fucking niche. This should be mainstream and my goal is to be mainstream.”

*****

Kondabolu performed to a standing-room-only crowd at the centre culturel Georges-Vanier this past Thursday Sept. 8, at an event co-hosted by CKUT, Rad Frosh 2011, and QPIRG Concordia and McGill.

The organizers led the set with the 15-minute film Manoj, which got big laughs, even though more than a few of those were for the simple jokes that Manoj was satirizing. Regardless, the audience was ready when Kondabolu took the stage.

It’s difficult to imagine an audience and a performer more perfect for each other than the crowd there and Hari Kondabolu. Educated young people who are politically aware seem to be the target market, and the Montreal crowd couldn’t get enough of the jokes or the worldview. He received a semi-standing ovation, which he later mocked in his Q&A.

Later he tweeted, “Fun show in Montreal. Had poutine after. Feel bad I need to leave this city so quickly.”

So does Montreal.

Visit harikondabolu.com for more information.

a, Arts & Entertainment

Kung fu film an action-packed epic

mymovies.ge

It’s 690 B.C. in ancient China, on the eve of a coronation that will vest a woman with the power of emperor for the first time in China’s history. Looming in the background is a titanic Buddha, under construction as a tribute to the empress’ power and the witness of several spontaneous human combustions. This is the mystery that the empress  calls Detective Dee back from prison to solve—the mystery of the phantom flame, a phenomenon that has felled several important personages surrounding the empress and the construction of the Buddha.  

Dee, played by leading talent Andy Lau, is a sagacious, kung fu-fighting sleuth who commits his all to solving the case despite a history of fomenting rebellion against the empress. In the process, he discovers a cloak-and-dagger subplot involving contending factions vying for the crown à la Game of Thrones. While Dee steers clear of external pressures and incentives, he becomes pseudo-romantically involved with the empress’ loyal protector, Jing’er, a feisty and limber sidekick with her own branch of rope-whipping kung fu (the movie approaches a sex scene but disappointingly fails to deliver).  

While the plot is certainly convoluted enough to engross most people for two hours, the real magnum-ness of the opus is the visual eye-feast. Each scene is lush with magical floating petals, lambent gold lighting, majestic talking deer, purple skies, or subterranean Dante-esque rivers populated by airborne automatons. The kung fu scenes amplify the imagery and make the action scenes resemble a prolonged minuet danced underwater. It is elaborate and entertaining. The choreography, engineered by Jackie Chan’s masterful mentor Sammo Hung, is drum-tight and applicable anywhere in the movie, from fighting deer to one-on-one battles suspended in mid-air by ropes. The rapid-fire kung fu movements parallel the battery of plot twists, and both work to keep the viewer attentive.  

Like any movie that employs fantasy elements and details a complicated story, Detective Dee toes the line of melodrama. This is compounded by the sometimes artificial graphics, such as the immolating victims of the phantom flame or city-wide shots that end up not being on-par with the rest of the movie’s visual splendor. Bouts of humor manage to mitigate this, allowing the artificiality to fit with the style of the movie—a tad over-the-top, like many wuxia films, but by no means kitsch or pretentious.  

Certain melodramatic instances are also infused with greater meaning considering contemporary China’s repressive atmosphere. The movie ends with the compelling message that right and wrong should not be confused when in office, and that there is a right time to turn power over to others. Echoing Henry David Thoreau, a blind man warns Dee as he is released from incarceration that one might be ultimately freer “inside” (of prison) than “outside,” where the empress’s dissenter-crushing stratagems have engendered fear and dissent. Her adage “to achieve greatness, everyone is expendable,” has motivated her to employ ruthless schemes against the people and inevitably brings to mind the current Chinese authorities’ reactions to the tragic train crash this past summer. Dee, in the end, gently reminds her that it’s torture that alienates the people from the empire. The film thus shies away from a typically Manichean good-bad dichotomy and, despite its sweeping imagery, offers some important messages.

In theatres Sept. 16.

a, Arts & Entertainment

2011 Polaris Music Prize Preview

The Polaris Music Prize is awarded annually to the best full-length Canadian album released that year, independent of genre or commercial success. Loosely based on the UK’s Mercury Prize, the judges evaluate each year’s nominees based on their creativity, diversity, and artistic integrity. Past winners include Caribou, Fucked Up, and Karkwa. This year’s gala will be held Sept. 19. And without further ado, the 2011 nominees…

 

Timber Timbre: Creep On Creepin’ On

Many thought Timber Timbre was robbed of a short list spot for its self-titled 2009 album, but this year’s nomination has more than just goodwill going for it. Creep On Creepin’  On, the band’s fourth record and first with multi-instrumentalists Mika Posen and Simon Trottier as official members, builds on the swamp-rock, spook-folk of past albums. It’s heavy on atmosphere—icy piano chords, weeping strings, three decidedly unsettling instrumentals—and singer/songwriter Taylor Kirk’s creamy croon acts as the cloaked narrator leading you by lantern into the dark. The record is carefully calculated with everything strategically placed for maximum eeriness, but it’s got a beating heart too, delivering lovelorn sentiments refracted through a twisted lens. This could easily take the prize, but it still might be a bit too “out there” for the jury.

 

Galaxie: Tigre et diesel

The only francophone group to be included on this year’s shortlist of nominees, Galaxie’s third album is one that will be unfamiliar to most people. The group hails from Montreal, which has a history of turning out good bands by the dozen (including last year’s Polaris-winner Karkwa). Tigre et diesel does nothing to contradict this reputation. Going from hard-hitting numbers like “Piste 1″ to the balladic strumming of “Jusqu’à la fin,” Galaxie displays enough versatility to keep the listener enthralled. With bass sections dense enough to rival Death From Above 1979 on tracks like “Camoflar” and “Diesel 2,” an enthusiastic high-energy delivery, and an ear for melody, the band is a class act. A Polaris win could be a possibility, though whether the judges will pick francophone groups two years running is another question.

 

Arcade Fire: The Suburbs

Despite almost universal popularity, anyone championing Arcade Fire’s third and newest album is going to have to deal with a lot of detractors, not that The Suburbs is bad. Win Butler channels The Boss as effectively as ever and Régine Chassagne’s vocals fit the moment so well on songs like “Sprawl II” that it’s almost heartbreaking. The apocalyptic tension of earlier albums has been tempered, one might say matured, to a more appropriate level. The Suburbs varies between straightforward anthems like its title track, and moody double-headers like “Half Light,” However, there is one simple reason for the naysaying: nothing is ever going to be better than Funeral. Furthermore, the mainstream success of The Suburbs (winning the 2011 Grammy and Juno for Album of the Year) prevents it from being a genuine contender for the Polaris Prize, despite what the judges may say about not being biased.

 

Braids: Native Speaker

Youngsters Braids’ debut Native Speaker created quite a stir in the music world. But despite possessing an incredible stage presence, I doubt many people will have been able to listen to the album from start to finish without getting either: (a) bored, or (b) confused. Braids seem to delight in experimentation for the sake of it, blending post-rock and dream-pop in bewitching fashion. They are a band of contradictions—the casual profanity of Raphaelle Standell-Preston’s lyrics on tracks like “Lemonade” clash with her girlish vocals, and most of the songs meander repetitively without ever seeming to conclude or even develop. All that being said, there’s still something hypnotic about Braids’ music. No one seems to know what they’re doing, perhaps least of all themselves. Native Speaker is an odd pick for Polaris and one that will inevitably provoke the question: “what are the judges getting that we aren’t?”

 

Austra: Feel It Break

The first thing to say about New Wave revivalists Austra is that their debut album Feel It Break is immediately listenable. The first few tracks channel everything that was great about the ‘80s movement, albeit with the polished production of this decade. Although Austra may not make a big splash when almost every other band seems to be jumping on the New Wave train these days, there is no denying their talent. The synth groove at the beginning of “Beat and The Pulse” would make even Hot Chip jealous, and lead singer Katie Stelmanis’s vocals vary from the monotone stylings of The Knife on “Darken Her Horse” to the shimmery textures of a choral section on “Lose It.” Nonetheless, Austra seems an unlikely choice for Polaris, simply because they fail to stand out from the pack.

 

Colin Stetson: New History Warfare Vol. 2: Judges

A betting man would put money on Colin Stetson winning the prize this year. Well, at least in some capacity. Aside from his own record, New History Warfare Vol. 2: Judges, he also contributed saxophone to both Arcade Fire’s The Suburbs and Timber Timbre’s Creep On Creepin’ On. Three out of 10 ain’t bad. Still, without question, his solo offering of avant-garde saxophone pieces is the most challenging and contentious record on the list (progressive virtuosity? Self-indulgent wankery? Both?). Whichever camp you happen to fall into, it can’t be denied that Stetson has created the most unique record to ever reach the ranks of Polaris. A dark horse for sure, it’s the type of left-field record jurors love to recognize, and that he even made it this far is a testament to the open ears of Canadian music critics. Weird, wild, and wonderful, this is wh
at the Polaris Prize is all about.

 

The Weeknd: House of Balloons

The surprise debut of Toronto-based R&B singer Abel Tesfaye (better known as The Weeknd—no “e”  in “end”) ticks all the boxes: his beats pay tribute to post-dub acts like James Blake and melancholic indie rockers the xx in equal measure, all the while cultivating a distinctive hip-hop sound. He quotes Pharrell Williams in “Glass Table Girls”—”I’m a nice dude, with some nice dreams.” His whispery, almost-feminine vocals go from falsetto to borderline misogynistic in a heartbeat. Two of the words often used to describe his music are “narcotic” and “nocturnal”—as exemplified by the fan-made music video for “What You Need.”  Given that it showcases so many underrepresented subgenres, House of Balloons could certainly be a top pick for Polaris.

 

Hey Rosetta!: Seeds

Nominated for a second time (their sophomore LP Into Your Lungs (and on through your heart and around through your blood) made the short list in 2009), Hey Rosetta! are the lone hope for the Maritimes this year. Seeds is a big record, layered with strings, keys, guitars, and percussion. Arcade Fire comparisons abound—both bands strive for catharsis via huge instrumentation—but Hey Rosetta! are equally adept at quieter, more reserved moments, albeit inbetween said grandness (see “Yer Fall.”) That Arcade Fire are also on the list doesn’t do wonders for their chances, and while they’re appreciated, it’s doubtful they’ll walk away with anything other than continued respect. Not a bad thing to reap.

 

Destroyer­: Kaputt

With Ron Sexsmith getting the attention for “lifetime achievement” it’s easy to forget that Dan Bejar’s Destroyer project has been around for almost as long. The Vancouver musician and New Pornographers member has been making eccentric music since 1995 and every album he’s put out since then has been predictably unpredictable. Kaputt, his ninth, is no exception, but with soft rock/smooth jazz influences, 80s synths, and horns it might be the least “Destroyer” of Destroyer records. It’s also arguably the best—a relaxed, breezy affair and a triumph of vision and aesthetic that is far more than pastiche. It would be the sexiest record to ever win the Polaris Prize, and it’s very likely that it will.

 

Ron Sexsmith: Long Player, Late Bloomer

The “lifetime achievement”  tag comes up a lot when discussing his short-list nod, but the fact that Sexsmith has been around so long wouldn’t mean anything if the songs on Long Player, Late Bloomer weren’t so strong. Working with producer Bob Rock, best known for his work with Mötley Crüe and Metallica, didn’t exactly seem like it would complement Sexsmith’s oft melancholic pop rock. But there are no glam rock solos or double kicks here, just a polished and well produced addition to Sexsmith’s storied canon. Maybe not a frontrunner to take home the prize, but a reminder that hard work and perseverance pay off. Lifetime achievement indeed.

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NFL Season Preview

AFC North

Baltimore Ravens – The Ravens are the team to beat in the AFC North this season. Joe Flacco is only improving with age and is becoming one of the elite young quarterbacks in the league. With Anquan Boldin at wide receiver and the addition of Lee Evans, Flacco has many options to throw to. The Ravens also have an elite running back in Ray Rice, who looks to have another big year. The defence has been the team’s driving force for years, with players such as Terrell Suggs, Ray Lewis and Ed Reed. With their offence on par with their defence, the Ravens can prove in week one that they are better than the Steelers. Note: the Ravens beat the Steelers 35-7 on Sunday.

Pittsburgh Steelers – The Steelers are coming into the season hungrier than ever after their heartbreaking loss to Green Bay in the Super Bowl. There are many reasons to believe they can have another great season. Troy Polamalu is finally healthy after being injured for almost a full season last year. He will surely add some interceptions and some great pass rushing to the already potent Pittsburgh defence. Ben Roethlisberger is still in his prime,  and has plenty of passing options and a great running back in Rashard Mendenhall who can run the ball effectively to further confuse opposing defences.

Cleveland Browns – The Browns look like a very promising team and their fans have plenty of reason to be excited, but this team simply is not good enough to compete in a division with the Steelers and the Ravens. Quarterback Colt McCoy has been handed the team after some solid starts last season. If the Browns are to be competitive this year, McCoy has to prove that he deserved his high draft selection. Their defence is quite young and, while it has potential, it does not look competitive enough to give the Browns a shot at the playoffs.

Cincinnati Bengals – The sorry Bengals once again look like one of the worst teams in the league this

year. The team is officially starting over following the departures of Carson Palmer and Chad Ochocinco, and Head Coach Marvin Lewis is intent on running the ball more this season with the loss of Palmer’s prowess at quarterback. While the Bengals look inexperienced on paper they may surprise a few people with a great group of young players going onto the field with something to prove.

 

AFC South

Indianapolis Colts – Nobody will mistake the 2011 Colts for the perennial powerhouse they have been for the past 7 years. Peyton Manning, the Colts’ four-time MVP quarterback, is coming off neck surgery in the off-season, and has a five-year, $90 million contract to live up to. Pro Bowl wide receiver Reggie Wayne and a rejuvenated line lead the offense, while defence remains, as before, the Colts’ Achilles heel.

Houstan Texans – The Texans’ offense is extremely dangerous, with Andre Johnson leading the receiving corps and reigning NFL rushing champ Arian Foster entering his third year in the league. The defense improved through free agency and the draft, but the change to a 3-4 defensive scheme may prove challenging for some of the younger players. If the Texans do win the division, it could be more due to the Colts’ injuries than their own successes.

Tennessee Titans – It’s out with the old and in with the new in Tennessee. The offense will be predominantly based around Pro Bowl running back Chris Johnson and wide receiver Kenny Britt. Look for ex-Seahawk Matt Hasselbeck to have a rebound year at quarterback. The defense is young and fast, and will be bolstered by second round pick linebacker Akeem Ayers, who fell to them at number 39 in this years draft.

Jacksonville Jaguars – The Jags are intent on doing the opposite of the other AFC South teams, namely, winning games with their defense. Jacksonville drafted quarterback-of-the-future Blaine Gabbert with the 10th overall pick in this year’s draft. Expect him to get some playing time. On the defensive side, the Jags did sign two linebackers this offseason and should be excited about getting defensive end Aaron Kampman back after losing him to injury last season.

 

 

AFC East

New England Patriots – As the cutain rises on another NFL season, spirits are once again running high in Foxboro. After a highly successful 14-2 season, Brady, Belichick, and crowd will have their sights on a longer playoff run. If they do, the line will have to do a better job protecting Brady. The flashy signings of Chad Ochocinco and Albert Haynesworth certainly won headlines, but it remains to be seen whether or not they will win games. New England will need these two to shine if they are to win their first playoff game since 2007.

New York Jets – Mark Sanchez’s critics have been loud and clear and the Jets have tried to address that by signing Plaxico Burress and Derrick Mason to replace the departed Jerricho Cotchery. New York’s defense will be strong once again and Rex Ryan will continue to fool opposing offenses with his defensive schemes. If the Jets’ defense can stifle Brady and the Patriots in their two divisional games, this team will have a great chance at taking the division.

Buffalo Bills – The Bills may turn out to be one of the great surprises of the NFL season. Another year of development for the young core of Ryan Fitzpatrick, Stevie Johnson, and CJ Spiller may signal the light at the end of a ten-year tunnel of ineptitude in Western New York. Watch for Spiller to take the starting job from veteran Fred Jackson. Buffalo is probably a couple of years away from competing in the AFC East, but they are finally trending up, which should be a relief for their long-suffering fans.

Miami Dolphins – This may be a long season for Dolphins fans. The addition of Reggie Bush is exciting, but as long as Chad Henne is lining up under centre, this team will not taste the playoffs. Davone Bess and Brandon Marshall will be enticing options in the air, but the offence will have to score a ton of points in order to make up for a shaky defensive corps. It may be time to think about the future in South Florida.

 

AFC West

San Diego Chargers – The Chargers have fantastic skill players at all positions. Phillip Rivers is one of the best, most underrated quarterbacks in the league. When he plays, Antonio Gates is the greatest tight end in the world. V-Jax, Malcolm Floyd, and Patrick Crayton make up a filthy cadre of wide receivers, and RBs Ryan Matthews and goal-line vulture Mike Tolbert make for a two-headed running monster. Special teams have been this group’s Achilles heel in the past, and judging from the first game this year, that hasn’t changed. Note: The Chargers allowed a 103 yard kickoff return to Minnesota’s Percy Harvin in week one.

Kansas City Chiefs – This is a team that has signs of regression painted all over it. The Chiefs overachieved heartily last year, largely due to recently-departed offensive co-ordinator Charlie Weis. Running back Jamaal Charles is a beast, and has been wastefully shackled by his backfield timeshare with Thomas Jones—Charles will produce no matter what, but quarterback Matt Cassell and wide receiver Dwayne Bowe could struggle immensely. This team should drop but neither of the teams ranked below have put together the kind of roster that can pass them.

Oakland Raiders – Oakland looked to be a team on the rise last year, but the loss of both premiere defensive player, cornerback Nnamdi Asomugha, and pass-catching tight end Zach Miller takes the gas out of the Raiders’ proverbial hot air balloon. Last year, running back Darren McFadden finally broke out and should continue to perform, but quarterback Jason Campbell isn’t great, nor is his receiving corp. Rookie wide receiver Denarius Moore has potential but solid production this year may be too much, too soon.

Denver Broncos – Like many other teams, the Broncoes will struggle under a new head coach (John Fox) early as they adjust to a shortened off-season. Denver also has a problem at pivot—Kyle Orton’s the starter for now, but he’s not good enough to lead a team deep into the playoffs and has no future in the Mile High city. Either Tebow needs to step way up, or the Broncoes need to tank hard and pick up one of the highly-touted quarterback prospects in the 2012 draft.

 

NFC North

Green Bay Packers – The Packers are coming off of the most successful football season possible: a Super Bowl win. Yet for a team that suffered six losses by six points or less with 15 players on injured reserve, the Packers are destined to remain one of the NFL’s greats this season. Led by playoff MVP Aaron Rodgers, this season the Packers are expected to challenge for the NFC title, and probably the Super Bowl again.

Chicago Bears – The Bears, backed by President Barack Obama, made it to the NFC finals, where they suffered a 21-14 loss to the Packers, their division rivals. The loss itself wouldn’t have been so bad if it hadn’t been for the extremely poor showing by quarterback Jay Cutler. If the Bears want to repeat their playoff appearance this season, it will be important for Cutler to improve his play and avoid becoming “NFC Finals” Cutler. Yet the team is in very good hands with head coach Lovie Smith and offensive guru Mike Martz, and the Bears will once again be playing meaningful games in January.

Detroit Lions – In 2008, the Detroit Lions finished dead last in the NFL with a 0-16 record. In 2009, the Lions finished 2-14, good for second to last place. In 2010, the Lions improved to 6-10, finishing third in the division and 21st in the league. Notice a trend? If quarterback Matthew Stafford can remain healthy and defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh can keep his form, the Lions should continue to improve their standing. The playoffs, however, still remain a few years away.M

Minnesota Vikings – The Vikings suffered a horrible season in 2010, coupled with various off-field distractions like the Randy Moss fiasco, Brett Favre’s NFL investigation, the Metrodome collapse and its subsequent modifications, and the firing of head coach Brad Childress mid-season. The 2011 season isn’t looking much brighter. With the third and final official retirement of Brett Favre, the Vikings didn’t help themselves by nabbing quarterback Donovan McNabb, an ex-star in the twilight of his career. New head coach Leslie Frazier will have a lot of work to do if he wants to bring this team back to what it used to be.

 

NFC South

Atlanta Falcons – The Falcons won the division last season and seem primed for a repeat this year. Atlanta was able to trade their spot in the 2011 draft from 27th to 6th overall and acquired wide receiver Julio Jones. Jones, a standout at University of Alabama, will make Atlanta a Super Bowl contender if he manages to live up to the expectations bestowed on him. As long as Roddy White and Tony Gonzalez continue to play their strong offensive game, the Falcons are set to make a deep run into the playoffs.

New Orleans Saints – Following their Super Bowl win in 2009, the Saints had a very disappointing playoffs in 2010, losing to the 7-9 Seattle Seahawks. During the off-season, the Saints lost their star running back Reggie Bush to free agency, but were able to draft Heisman trophy winner running back Mark Ingram, for whom the team has very high expectations. With Drew Brees at the helm, the Saints are once again expected to make the playoffs and compete for the Super Bowl title.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Last season, the Buccaneers were one win away from making the playoffs, winning one less game than division rival Saints. Although wide receiver Mike Williams promises the playoffs, many wonder if the Buccaneers are a bubble team or if they’re the real deal. Led by quarterback Josh Freeman and wide receiver Mike Williams, the Buccaneers have a solid core of young, talented players with a lot of room for improvement. But with few off-season improvements, Tampa Bay’s star players will have to carry a lot of weight if the team is to make it to the playoffs.

Carolina Panthers – After a disappointing 2010, Panthers fans know that the road back to the playoffs is a long-term dream. Going 2-14 last season, the Panthers were able to draft Auburn star quarterback Cam Newton, who fills one of the great gaps in the Panthers’ line-up. Following last season’s disappointing record, previous head coach John Fox’s contract was not renewed, and Jon Rivera was hired as the new head coach. Although Rivera predicts the Panthers will win ten games this season, five wins is a more accurate projection.

 

 

NFC East

Dallas C
owboys – The Cowboys are entering the 2011 season with more to prove than any other team in the NFL. The offense brings back Tony Romo and the defense boasts pass rushing specialist DeMarcus Ware, who has been the NFL sacks leader for two of the past three seasons. Head coach Jason Garret’s first personnel move was to bring in new defensive co-ordinator Rob Ryan (brother of Jets head coach Rex Ryan) to challenge the high-octane offenses of the NFC.

New York Giants – The Giants have gone with defensive players in the draft seven of the past eight seasons, this year drafting Nebraska defensive back Prince Amukamara to complement an already formidable pass rush. The Giants boast a very good defensive line and an underrated group of linebackers. Amukamara, who was widely considered the best cornerback in the draft, will complement an already very capable defensive corps. On the offensive front, Eli Manning leads an offense that will probably remain dedicated to the running attack.

Philadelphia Eagles – The Eagles made a splash in the off-season, taking advantage of the free agent frenzy following the end of the lockout. The Eagles shelled out big contracts to All-Pro defensive back Namdi Asomugha, defensive end Jason Babin and re-signed quarterback Michael Vick to a blockbuster $100 million dollar contract. Watch for wide receiver DeSean Jackson to have a huge year; he is resuming his role as the main punt and kick returner after the “Miracle at the Meadowlands” last year against the Giants.

Washington Redskins – Redskins head coach Mike Shanahan cleaned house in a very busy and public manner this summer, shipping out disgruntled defensive lineman Albert Haynesworth for a fifth round pick in the 2013 draft. Quarterback Donovan McNabb was also released, creating a quarterback competition between former cast-offs John Beck and Rex Grossman. The defense will be hard pressed to contain the elite offences in the NFC and the offence will probably not fare much better with either Grossman or Beck at the helm.

 

NFC West

St. Louis Rams – Simply by virtue of having burgeoning young star quarterback Sam Bradford at the controls, the Rams have a leg-up in this year’s race to mediocrity. Josh McDaniels is still offensively brilliant, and his addition as offensive co-ordinator should further accelerate Bradford’s already turbo-charged development. Further help will come from the addition of wide receiver Mike Sims-Walker. Although he played poorly last year, Sims-Walker could emerge as a credible WR1 with Bradford’s talents. Assuming injuries to running back Steven Jackson and Bradford aren’t serious, this team should be able to be just less-bad enough than its divisional competitors to get to the playoffs.

Arizona Cardinals – Based on an incredibly small sample of games played, Kevin Kolb seems like he might be a legitimate solution at the quarterback position. However, just because there’s a solid signal-caller tossing to wide out Larry Fitzgerald again doesn’t mean that this team is going to be able to get back to the Kurt Warner glory days anytime soon. Corner Patrick Peterson was a great pick, but a porous offensive line and no run game should leave the Cards on the outside looking in come playoff time.

San Francisco 49ers – Poor Jim Harbaugh, going from coaching that surefire number one overall QB pick to this 2005 first overall QB selection is the definition of the word letdown. Harbaugh is confident he can get something out of Alex Smith, but colour me skeptical. The receiving corps is there, with newly-added Braylon Edwards lining up alongside second-year Michael Crabtree, it just remains to be seen whether or not Smith can deliver the ball. Frank Gore should have a good year, assuming he can stay healthy.

Seattle Seahawks – Tavaris Jackson is not good enough to start at the NFL level. That’s as kindly as it can be said. Free agent acquisitions Zach Miller and Sidney Rice should make plays if they can get the ball, but that’s unlikely. Seattle will miss longtime quarterback Matt Hasselbeck and will not make it back to the playoffs despite the mediocrity of the league’s worst division. Welcome to Seattle, Andrew Luck!

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An Ode to Bettman

The final series of the 2011 NHL playoffs will be remembered for several reasons. Perhaps for being the first professional sports event in which players tried to stuff their fingers in each other’s mouths. Maybe as the year when Vancouverites tried to burn their city to the ground because they lost a hockey game. Again. For me, the highlight of the playoffs came just after game seven finished and before the riots began. Vancouver fans gave Gary Bettman one of the best boo-ings I’ve ever heard. A boo-ing so loud that the league commisioner had to scream as loud as he could into the arena microphone system to be heard over the roar.

To the uninvolved hockey fan, it might seem strange that every time the commissioner of the NHL makes an appearance, the fans boo him with all their might. I’ve been asked a few times why they do this, and my response was the same as any true hockey fan’s: “because they should.”

To elaborate on this point, though, I composed a brief poem to Gary Bettman.

Gary Bettman, How do I hate thee? Let me count the ways.

I hate thee for not one, but two lockouts. ‘94, and ‘04 no more.

I hate thee for thy silly expansions: Phoenix, Tampa Bay, and Atlanta hath nary an ice rink, nor a hockey stick.

I hate thee for moving thy Jets and thy Nordiques from this Great White North to that Great Hot South.

I hate thee for the shootout, which shall occur only in an All-Star contest.

I hate thee for thy new penalty rules. Hockey art not soccer. Thou shalt not receive two minutes for love-bumps.

I hate thee for signing with Versus, the worst TV network of yore.

I hate thee for threatening Vancouver’s Green Men.

I hate thee for touch icing.

I hate thee for thy bloated salary, which thou hast neither earned, nor deserved.

I hate thee for thy smug demeanor. Thou dost not know best.

I shall hate thee until my death.

Private

Redmen lose home opener; winless streak now at 14

Sam Reynolds

Regular season football rolled into Percival Molson Stadium on Friday night. A boisterous crowd of 5,512 fans sparked the Redmen to an early lead, but special teams and an outstanding game by quarterback Jeremi Doyon-Roch were the difference for Sherbrooke en route to a 39-13 victory for the Vert-et-Or.

McGill came out strong, recovering a Sherbrooke fumble on the opening kickoff and capitalizing with a field goal to take an early 3-0 advantage.  The lead, however, didn’t last long into the second quarter. A series of short swing screen passes, coupled with a persistent running game and a deep threat passing game, overwhelmed the Redmen who were carrying a burdensome 13-game losing streak on their backs into the home opener.

“We need to be better on offence,” Head Coach Sonny Wolfe said. He stressed that to climb up the standings they’ll need to “keep the defence off the field, and concentrate more on discipline.” Seven offside penalties put McGill in an uphill battle in the second half as well.

McGill rookie quarterback Dallon Kuprowski demonstrated sporadic success in mounting a drive of seven plays for 79 yards in the first quarter and a 12-play 70-yard drive in the third. The Redmen, however, only came away with two short field goals off of Austin Anderson’s boot. The inexperience of the young 18-year-old QB getting his second career start was evident when he threw two interceptions in the third. When asked about the young pivot, Wolfe spoke of his quarterback’s confidence and said he “fared very well despite the field position.” Wolfe added, “the more he plays the better he’ll get.”

Sherbrooke won the field position battle on the shoulders of Raphael Gagne and Ismael Malik Bamba, who combined for 149 returning yards. Rookie QB Jeremi Doyon-Roch completed 26 of 37 passes for 362 yards to a receiving corps highlighted by Simon Charbonneau-Campeau, who hauled in eight passes for 131 yards including a pivotal 53-yard reception that spurred the offence in the second half.  

McGill’s defence held strong for much of the first half, generating a sack and forcing a fumble that was returned to the house by Alexander Hutchison III. The feat stunned the defensive lineman himself. “It was all in slow motion,” Hutchison said. “All of a sudden I realized I had to start running, I woke up, and I found the endzone.” It was Hutchison’s first career touchdown, and he got there in blazing speed. He hopes to “one day run a 40 (yard dash) that fast again.”

Next on the schedule are two games in Wolfville, NS to play the Acadia Axemen, and Quebec City to face league-powerhouse Laval. The Redmen are back on Sept. 30th for the Fill The Stadium game against Bishop’s.

Private

Wake up for the cup

The 2011 Rugby World Cup is a love-driven addiction for fans and players alike around the world. Canadians and expats will be staving off sleep to watch games in New Zealand that start at ungodly hours over the next two months. Similar to the FIFA World Cup, the Rugby World Cup (RWC) fields sixteen teams—including Canada—for this quadrennial event. One of the most popular sporting events in the world, the RWC is a global spectacle that wows devout rugby enthusiasts and new fans over an eight-week thrill ride.

The RWC is a relatively new event; the inaugural tournament was played in 1987 as New Zealand took the Webb Ellis trophy on home soil. England, South Africa, and Australia have all won the tournament, with the latter two having taken home multiple championships.  Showcasing rugby’s global reach, teams from Samoa, Namibia, Romania, and Argentina are competing. Despite rugby’s niche popularity in Canada, the Canadian National team ranks 14th, below Japan and above Fiji.

Canadian rugby has a long and rich history spanning over 150 years. The first recorded Canadian rugby game was played at McGill University, as students from our university played against British officers stationed in Montreal. Rugby is most prevalent in countries that were under British colonial rule, but unfortunately for Canada, the game never quite caught on as it did in other places.

This year’s RWC is primed to become a classic. In the past, there has been a clear-cut favourite going into the tournament, but after #1 ranked New Zealand lost to Australia in the Tri Nation’s Cup at the beginning of this month, the door is wide open for the Wallabies, Springboks, and All Blacks of the Southern Hemisphere to take on the powers of the North: England, Ireland, and France.

When taking in a game at your favourite sports bar, at home (TSN is showing all games), or if you can make it down to New Zealand, keep an eye out for the stars of the game today. Ma’a Nonu, the Kiwi centre is on par with Australian scrumhalf Will Genia as the most exciting player on the planet. The stalwarts of the game are New Zealand captain Richie McCaw, Wallaby flanker David Pocock, and Irish outside centre, Brian O’Driscoll.

There is a large disparity between the top ten teams in the world and the rest – colloquially dubbed the ‘Rugby Minnows.’ Canada will have winnable matches against Japan and Tonga, with their tougher tests coming against New Zealand and France in Pool A. The Canadian team is optimistic after two solid pre-tournament wins against the United States plus a game against an Australian Barbarians side (club team all-stars). Led by captain Pat Riordan, a hooker from Victoria, the Canadian side looks to get scoring from centre DTH van der Merwe, fullback James Pritchard and lock Jamie Cudmore. 21-year-old Connor Trainor, a Vancouver native, joins Taylor Paris, an 18-year-old from Barrie as two of the brightest young players Canada has produced in recent memory. Brothers Phil and Jamie MacKenzie—winger and scrumhalf—represent a growing number of Canadians playing professionally overseas, developing their skills and helping rugby in Canada grow. Get ready for some long nights and awesome rugby.

Private

National champs drop two to Concordia

Ryan Reisert
Ryan Reisert

It was a beautiful day for baseball Saturday, as many fans made the trek to Trudeau Park in Côte-Saint-Luc to watch McGill battle the Stingers in a doubleheader. The defending national champions were looking to bounce back after their first defeat of the season to divisional rivals Concordia. However, the afternoon did not go as planned as the Redmen (0-3) lost both contests by scores of 3-0 and 9-4.

Over the course of the twin bill, McGill’s pitching and hitting were solid but struggled with consistency. However, Head Coach Ernie D’Alessandro was quick to point out that key players were missing, one being Casey Auerbach, who is injured but should be in uniform soon. “It takes some time to gel but we’ll bounce back and win some ball games. It’s a long season and we’ve only played a few games. They’re a good bunch of guys and we’ll improve,” D’Alessandro said, emphasizing that it is still early in the season.

The first contest began as a pitcher’s duel, with both starting aces looking sharp and in top form. Down 2-0 in the bottom of the fifth, with McGill in trouble with the bases loaded, starting pitcher L.J. Aguinaga induced a ground ball and the infield managed to turn a double play to get out of the jam. The Stingers’ starting pitcher threw a complete game, allowing only two hits in the three-run victory.

In need of some offence in game two, the Redmen hoped to revive their bats and they did just that as the match rolled along. In the top of the first inning with one runner on base, Chris Ames hit a two-run homerun to put McGill ahead. The Redmen led off with a double in the second, and with two outs all-Canadian Josh Gordon doubled to drive in another run. Gordon eventually made it home following a throwing error making it 4-0 for McGill. With a good start under their belts, things took a turn for the worse in the bottom of the second. Concordia scored five and never looked back. McGill only managed four runs, with all of them coming in the second inning.

Chris Ames, one of the bright spots of the day, highlighted what went wrong in game two. “We were up four nothing early which is nice,” Ames said. “We had a couple of good innings but we gave a few free passes to some of their hitters and let them get back in the game. We just didn’t keep the pressure on, we just kind of faded and they took the game over.”

Game one starter, L.J. Aguinaga threw a solid 5 2/3 innings, striking out three and giving up only three earned runs. He doesn’t want the team to panic and forget its identity. “We have a lot of rookies on the team and we’re still trying to put things together,” Aguinaga said, echoing his coach’s words. “We’re the National Champions and we’re here to defend our title for sure, but we still have to get the job going right now … We’ve got thirteen more games and we should definitely put out a good record for the rest of the season.”

Although the start of the Redmen’s season has been disappointing, the buzz and intensity surrounding this squad is undeniable. Everyone is optimistic as McGill is looking to regain their championship form, and from all indications it certainly seems that they will.

Student Life

Taking a gander at Goose Village

As I trudged by a workshop on Mill Street in the pouring rain, a kind-eyed, pony-tailed glassblower stared at me.  He wore an expression of shock and sympathy, holed up in his abode of warm kilns and red-hot vases.  I had little time to stop and commiserate, so I pushed through the growing puddles. I was almost at my destination, the once-thriving riverside Goose Village.

I had already passed under Autoroute Bonaventure­—the traffic artery of Montreal’s Centre Ville—skirted a crumbling but functional distillery, and left the old Ogilvie’s Flour Mill behind me.  Up ahead I saw a behemoth Costco at a crossroads filled with traffic departing and entering the city from Pont Victoria.  Passing a wind-battered Chinese depanneur, I reached Bridge Street quickly, once the heart of a vibrant neighborhood of Italian, Irish, Polish, and Ukrainian immigrants.

Goose Village got its name from the waterfowl that once occupied the banks of the St. Lawrence at this spot.  First Irish immigrants, then Italians, built the little village into a community by the end of the 19th century, and into the 1960s the area pulsed with Catholic fervor and neighborly vivacity.  At the height of its growth, Goose Village took up the space due west of the Old Port and south of Rue Notre Dame, running all the way to the St. Lawrence River. However, in the 1960s things changed—or rather, they were forced to change—and quickly.

In the years before Expo 67, Mayor Jean Drapeau led a campaign to purge Montreal of what might be perceived as blights by outside visitors.  Goose Village suffered mightily.  Residents were informed that the area was to be bulldozed; since its poor (yet energetic) streets were among the first to be seen by cars entering downtown from both major bridges, the “blight” had to go.

Now, over fifty years later, the kind-eyed glassblower was not simply astonished at my slog through the tempest, but rather that I was going to Goose Village at all.  But I wished to see what was left.  Were there any resilient mom-and-pop corner stores or toddlers plodding the streets, jumping in muddy puddles?

The journey started off promisingly enough.  Exiting Griffintown (just northeast of Goose Village), there remained costume shops for nightlife masqueraders, and satisfied young professionals alighted the decks of bistros, umbrellas in hand. A residential atmosphere was recognizable.

The feeling hardly lasted.  Heading down Duke Street, a graffitied shack clung to the side of a vacant brick tenement building.  Crossing the Lachine Canal onto Mill Street, the civilized city seemed to recede behind the clouds and the gray industrialism of the waterfront. Although wind and rain kept denizens off the street that day, I had the eerie feeling that a balmy, sunny afternoon would have brought out no more than one or two.  

I stood at the Costco crossroads, momentarily disheartened.  Traffic whizzed shoppers away from the megastore.  A cop perched his car on a median, slowing traffic.  But there was one last saving grace whose timelessness I had to sequester, and from what I had heard, it was just down the street.

Down Bridge Street I trudged, crossing overgrown train tracks, and there it was: the massive, rugged, jagged Black Rock.  The rock is a memorial, erected in 1859 to honour thousands of Irish immigrants who had died there of typhus in small shacks ten years prior.  For years it has stood as the pride of the Irish community, and for Goose Village, those who survived went on to build a flourishing, homey neighborhood.  Now, the rock is solitary yet comforting, with an empty green hill and tumbledown shacks in the background.

If you go to old Goose Village, there are glimmers amongst the grayness.  The Espace Verre glassblowers run three exhibitions each year.  Take the Lachine Canal bike paths from the Old Port to Atwater Market (on a sunnier day), or if you find yourself milling about Griffintown, simply satisfy your curiosity and go see the relic of Goose Village next door.

Arts & Entertainment

Jay-Z and Kanye West: Watch the Throne

Released exclusively online on Aug. 8, Jay-Z and Kanye West’s Watch The Throne embraces a growing trend in the music industry that prioritizes digital music over the aging CD. With this release comes an album that, according to the duo, will bring commercial and critical legitimacy to another game-changing movement they call “luxury rap.”

A typical gripe with rap music is its obsession with all things super rich, but these two know how to make this sort of arrogance sound endearing. Jay-Z and Yeezy will tell you how many foreign watch, car, and clothing companies they throw money at, but you can’t hate them for it. However, maybe if these two weren’t so concerned with their critical reputations, they would have released an album filled entirely with instantly gratifying songs like “Otis,” “Who Gon Stop Me,” and “Illest Motherfucker Alive.” The heavier stuff (“Murder to Excellence,” “Made in America”) makes the album drag at times, and the tracks sound as if they were conceived with only halfhearted seriousness.

Watch The Throne has a few quirks, including dialogue snippets from Blades of Glory, a sample from the Chariots of Fire soundtrack, and a cartoony-sounding coda that infrequently creeps its way between a few tracks. Though not all the beats may be radio-friendly or loaded with catchy hooks, Jay-Z and Kanye made an album that continues to demonstrate the duo’s irresistible stylishness.

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