Student Life

STUDENT LIVING: HOW-TO-Prank your roommate

You will encounter many challenges throughout your university experience: making decisions about your daunting major concentration, dealing with significant other problems, answering the question “to drink or not to drink” and of course, facing the quintessential university roommate dilemmas. For those in residence, random roommate placement can be wonderful or disastrous. After first year, however, when you finally get to choose your own housing companions, these guys/girls often become either your siblings or worst enemies and sometimes they ‘re both, depending on the day. Regardless of whether your roommate is nasty or your best friend, there is nothing wrong with plotting sweet housemate revenge every so often. I mean, just look at all those unwashed dishes in the sink.

Shampoo that’s to dye forMessing with shampoo is always key, especially if your roommate is of the female gender. Semi-permanent hair dye can be purchased at any drug store and strategically added to your roommate’s shampoo. A personal favourite: black hair dye for the blonde roommate.

Stay healthy!Feign sickness one day and take a trip to the healthcare centre… you won’t be sorry! Within the walls of the Brown Building are a number of pamphlets on sexual identity, pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Place said pamphlets (particularly the ones about STDs) around your roommate’s bedroom. This is particularly effective if the parents are coming up to visit, or if he/she has a significant other who stays over every night to disturb your precious, precious sleep.

Chicken à la radiatorPut a slab of raw chicken in your roommate’s radiator. The smell will pervade their room for months before they’re able to find it! Warning: this is a stupid idea if the bedroom is shared.

Bye bye birdie? Hello birdie! For the roommate with an extreme fear of winged creatures, sprinkle birdseed on her windowsill. Not only will your roommate be roused by the chipper song of the early bird, but if her bed is near the window, she will come face-to-face with a mortal enemy.

Inch by inchGot a roommate with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder? Use it to your advantage! Drive him/her crazy by shifting the furniture by a mere inch everyday; they’ll think the room is slowly closing in on them. Note: also works for roommates with claustrophobia.

Hygiene interventionIs your roomie preoccupied with the size of his/her pores? Add rubbing alcohol to her bottle of facial toner and watch the breakouts begin.

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