Dear Ainsley, We are already halfway through the semester and I will soon need to pack up my room in res to go home for the summer, but I still don’t know where I’ll be coming back to in September. Time has gone by so fast and I now realize[Read More…]
Articles by Ainsley
Ask Ainsley: How to maintain your New Year’s resolutions in three easy steps
Dear Ainsley, It is January 15th and already I have given up on my New Year’s resolution. I woke up on January 1st with a smile so wide it practically fell off my face, ready to tackle 2024. Goodbye eating cheese puffs for breakfast and watching Drew Monson every Friday[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How not to get lost
Dear Ainsley, I write to you in utmost embarrassment. It has come to my attention that I have absolutely no sense of direction. In the past, I have been so reliant on my Maps app and my friends that I didn’t realize I had no clue where I was going.[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: Finding your perfect summer internship
Dear Ainsley, I have been stressed out of my mind and completely flipping out trying to find an internship. It’s now the end of February, and I feel a low, dark hopelessness creeping in. My mind is a never-ending swirl of “Have other people really applied to 50 internships already?”[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: Managing the winter blues
Dear Ainsley, I am back at school, mid-January, and here I find myself in the bleak midwinter. I feel more and more sluggish and unmotivated as the days grow shorter. With the sun setting before 5 p.m. and school routines returning, many McGill students, including myself, are experiencing depressive moods,[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: Studying and self-care during finals
Dear Ainsley, During exam season, I’m a mess. I stay in my apartment all day trying to work, I spend hours scrolling through social media with increasing levels of stress, and my mind is a tangle of negative thoughts. I hate this. Please help. Freaking Out Over Finals (FOOF) Before[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: I forgot how to study for in-person classes!
Dear Ainsley, I’m a second-year ArtSci student returning to campus after a full year of online classes. I feel like I’ve lost touch with the rhythms of in-person studies and I’m overwhelmed with these first couple of weeks on campus. When I began studying for my courses, I was hit[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How should I handle rejection?
Dear Ainsley, It’s been a rough couple of weeks for me. I’ve sent out over 20 summer job applications, got two interviews, and no offers. I’m entering my final year next year and am worried that I’ll be unprepared to enter the workforce without professional experience. Plus, though I know[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: What can I do for fun this winter in Montreal with all of the new restrictions?
Dear Ainsley, The Quebec government’s announcement of new public health measures has me discouraged, to say the least. I’m entering my last semester at McGill, and I want to make the most of my time in this dynamic city. During normal times, I enjoy socializing with friends, going to the[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: Should I get a part-time job next semester?
Dear Ainsley, I’m not sure if I should get a part-time job for next semester. I do want to start building toward financial independence, but I’m worried that an added commitment to schoolwork and extracurriculars will be difficult to manage. A lot of my friends tell me they’re able to[Read More…]
Anxious about the return to in-person learning
Hi Ainsley, With September approaching, I am feeling anxious about returning to in-person learning. I am starting my second year at McGill after finishing the first one entirely online, and I have not had the chance to connect with a lot of people in my program. I feel a little[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How can I enjoy Montreal safely this summer?
Dear Ainsley, These days, I feel a mixture of excitement and sadness about the upcoming summer. On one hand, I’m glad to have a break, but on the other, I know I won’t be able to do many of the things I usually would. I miss travelling and enjoying Montreal’s[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I maintain connections with peers virtually?
Dear Ainsley, With most of my days spent indoors without the usual hustle and bustle of campus life, I am finding it difficult to stay in touch with acquaintances. On-campus classes and parties were what brought us together, so it’s been harder to maintain relationships in their absence. What can[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I heal from a pandemic breakup?
Dear Ainsley, As if dealing with the current state of the world wasn’t hard enough, I’m now newly single and left to cope with my pandemic breakup. Before, I’d usually get dressed up and spend the night dancing away my pain with my closest friends. Now, all I can do[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I network remotely?
Dear Ainsley, I’m a fourth-year Arts student stressed about post-graduation life. I was under the impression that I’d have lots of networking opportunities in my final year of undergrad. However, since classes have gone online, I’m finding it hard to make connections with employers and professors. I’m worried I won’t[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: Should I be worried about the coronavirus?
Dear Ainsley, I’m very scared of this emerging coronavirus that’s been spreading around the world and killing people. My friends tell me that I’m the type of person who thinks of the worst case scenario when it comes to my wellbeing. Whenever I am near people who cough, I get[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I recover my GPA?
Dear Ainsley, I’m a third-year Arts student returning to McGill after a terrible Fall semester. In addition to struggling with the class material, I was coping with personal issues and my grades took a hit. I feel like the drop in my GPA erased all the hard work and progress[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: Coming home for the holidays
Dear Ainsley, I’m dreading going home for the holidays and seeing my family again, and this fear has been hanging over me since midterms. My parents can be really strict and critical, especially about my weight, grades, and struggles with my mental health. The prospect of seeing them again and[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: Should I go to grad school?
Dear Ainsley, I’m an Arts student in my third year, and everyone around me seems to be gearing up for grad school. I’m not quite sure I know what I want to do with the rest of my life, but the thought of no longer having the structure of school[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: I think I need help
Dear Ainsley, I’ve been denying that I need help, but I don’t think I can anymore. Over the last few months, I just don’t get excited about the things I used to enjoy, I’m struggling to even get out of bed, and I feel numb, like I’m running on autopilot.[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How can I move on after being ghosted?
Ainsley offers advice on getting past getting ghosted.
Ask Ainsley: How can I make friends in my lectures?
Ainsley gives advice on making friends in class.
Ask Ainsley: How can I balance my academic and personal life?
Advice on juggling your responsibilities at university.
Ask Ainsley: I’m worried I might fail a class, what should I do?
Dear Ainsley, I have not been doing well in one of my classes and now that finals are approaching, I am extremely worried about failing this class. Is there anything I can do between now and the final to avoid failing, or should I just withdraw now? Sincerely, Freaking About[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: Am I too late in applying for a summer internship?
Dear Ainsley, I am having trouble finding an internship for this summer. I’ve applied for a few, but have been rejected from some and haven’t heard back from others. My friends are starting to get acceptances, and I can’t help but compare myself to them. I’m worried it’s now too[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I manage a long-distance Valentine’s Day?
Dear Ainsley, Last year, my significant other of three years graduated and moved to Vancouver while I remained at McGill. We have always gone out and celebrated Valentine’s Day together by doing something special. This is our first year apart on this holiday, and I don’t know what I can[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: My ex and I share the same friend group. How do I navigate our breakup?
Dear Ainsley, I recently broke up with my partner, but we are in the same friend group so I’m forced to see them around my friends all the time. How can I properly deal with the break up while staying friends with my ex in order to avoid causing tension[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I overcome the winter blues?
Dear Ainsley, I'm an international student at McGill and I come from a country that experiences a hot and dry climate for the majority of the year. I felt like the weather during the fall was fine, but I’m having trouble getting through the Winter semester so far. I'm more[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: My roommate doesn’t like me bringing people home. What gives?
Dear Ainsley, I've recently been bringing guys home with me to hook up and my roommate isn't happy about it. But it's not like I'm bringing home strangers. It's getting unbearable, and I'm stressed all the time. What do I do? My roommate just doesn't seem to understand. Sincerely, Handling[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I leave my friend group?
Dear Ainsley, I have been thinking about moving on from my friend group for a while, because they aren't really serving me anymore, and I think it's time. The hard part, though, is that we've been a set group of friends for years, and I'm not sure how to casually[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How can I have a safe one-night stand?
Dear Ainsley, Now that I’m in my first year of university, I feel like a lot of my friends are having one-night stands. I’ve never had one before, but I want to prepare myself for the possibility. Do you have any tips on how to have a safe one-night stand?[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: My friend committed suicide. How do I cope?
Dear Ainsley, A couple of weeks ago, one of my oldest friends committed suicide. I’m still completely in shock about the situation and can’t shake the feeling that I could have done something to help them. I’m having a lot of trouble processing this situation, and I’m not sure how[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I learn to put myself first?
Dear Ainsley, Schoolwork is piling up and my stress level is rising—all the while, one of my best friends is constantly asking me to hang out late at night. I know she’s going through a rough patch after recently breaking up with her significant other, but I've been losing sleep, with[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: Should I go to therapy?
Dear Ainsley, Since classes started this year, I have started experiencing a lot of anxiety for the first time in my life. I am considering going to see a therapist, but I’m really nervous about it because I’ve never seen one before, and as far as I know, none of[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: I just had my first panic attack. What do I do?
Dear Ainsley, I just had my first panic attack after finding out that I’d failed a test, and it really scared me. What do I do to keep this from happening in the future? What resources are available to me? Sincerely, Perplexed About my Panic Attack (PAPA) Dear PAPA, First[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: I’m developing feelings for my casual hookup. What do I do?
Dear Ainsley, I recently started hooking up with someone new. Everything has been going well so far and they’re super fun, but I can’t help but worry that I’m going to get attached, and from what I’ve heard, they’re not looking for anything serious at the moment. To be honest,[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: Should I break up with my partner for voting for Trump?
Dear Ainsley, My boyfriend voted for Trump, and I don’t support this. Should we break up? Sincerely, Perplexed about Politics (PAP) Dear PAP, As a pretty fierce liberal, upon reading your question my initial response was “absolutely.” I can’t count the amount of arguments I’ve gotten into with friends and[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I cope with my best friend and my ex dating?
Dear Ainsley, A friend of mine from back home recently told me she’s been dating my ex for four months and lying about it. I’m not so much mad that they’re dating, more so that they lied for four months. Also, when she told me, she was incredibly insensitive and[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I have an orgasm?
Dear Ainsley, I’m a cisgender, straight female and a first-year student at McGill. So far, I’m loving Rez, school, and all the friends I’m meeting, but there’s something that’s been bothering me. In high school, I briefly had a boyfriend, with whom I had sex. Since then, I’ve had a[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: How do I network with my professors?
Dear Ainsley, I’m going into my third-year in September, and even though it’s far away, the thought of graduate school is already weighing heavily on my mind. I’m fairly certain my GPA will be good enough to get into the schools I want to apply to, but I feel like[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: “What should I expect coming into first year?”
Dear Ainsley, Dear Ainsley, I am entering my first year at McGill in the Fall, and I'm not quite sure what to expect academically. I've heard grade deflation at McGill can be severe, and that classes are rigorous. What should I expect? Sincerely, Frightened First Year (FFY) Dear FFY, To[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: “How can I avoid blacking out?”
Dear Ainsley, Last weekend I went to a party at a friend’s house. I was drinking vodka and not really counting my shots and I ended up blacking out for the first time. My friends took great care of me, but I still woke up the next morning feeling really[Read More…]
Ask Ainsley: “How do I talk about condoms with my partner?”
Dear Ainsley, I am bad at negotiating condom use and will often not mention it if the other person doesn’t. What are some tactics to bring this up when my partner doesn’t want to? Sincerely, How to Wrap it Up? Dear HTWU, I always used to pride myself on my[Read More…]